Thursday, November 7, 2013

Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian (2015??)

Thought I'd have a tiny bit of fun at the expense of you all. But lets go on the assumption that not only BEETLEJUICE 2 gets made. But they finally produce Tim Burton's original concept for the sequel which sees Beetlejuice and the Deetz family going to Hawaii. Seeing the original plot was written in 1990, of course several things would have to change. Especially considering Winona Ryder is quite a bit older when she played the part of daughter Lydia Deetz.

But here's how it could work.

26 years have passed since Lydia Deetz last did her mid-air Tango to Shake Shake Shake Senora (Jump in the Line) after nearly being forced to marry Beetlejuice. Since that time, she had not seen or heard of Beetlejuice and assumes he's stuck in the netherworld.

She has long since stopped dressing like a groupie at a Cure concert and has followed in her father's footsteps as a real estate developer first working with her Dad to create a super successful company and then starting a family with a pre-teen daughter who looks somewhat the way she did in the previous movie.
Although, Lydia has left most of her old life behind, the one thing she did keep was the model of the town Adam Maitland made from the first movie. The Maitlands are said to still haunt the house and gave Lydia the model as a gift when she left for college.

However, little did Lydia know that Beetlejuice somehow found a way out of the afterlife and is back to residing in the model town. Since Lydia has become more "ordinary", she no longer sees him. However, Lydia's daughter does. And that's how she's first introduced to Beetlejuice.

Before all this, the story begins with Lydia and her family moving to Hawaii. Lydia has been sent there to build a resort. However, she is unaware due to a scrupulous business partner (perhaps played by Paul Reubens) who does not tell her that the property resides on an ancient burial ground. During the dig, Lydia's daughter finds an Tiki idol.


Not unlike the one around Greg Brady's neck...
Which unleashes the spirit of an evil Kahuna spirit.

During dinner (because that's when all these conversations are brought up) Lydia's daughter asks her Mother about Beetlejuice. This awakens Lydia's memory. Especially what happens when you say his name three times. She tries to convince her daughter that there's no such thing and her daughter obviously imagines it. When Lydia's daughter nearly says his name a second time, Lydia snaps at her not to say his name. Lydia's daughter asks why? Lydia, no longer able to keep up the charade, tells her daughter everything and what a horrible person (or ghost) Beetlejuice is.


Things get worse (as they usually do) and the Kahuna spirit causes troubles in both Lydia's development and on the island. The island now being threatened by a volcano. Lydia's craven partner puts the blame on her and Lydia and her family are being threatened by everyone.

Lydia's daughter talks to Beetlejuice. Tells him that she knows what happened between him and Lydia. Beetlejuice promises he has changed (of course he hasn't) and says he can make everything right.

All she has to do is say his name two more times.

Which she does, much to Lydia's chagrin. And Beetlejuice is back.


Dialogue between Beetlejuice and Lydia might be something like this.

BEETLEJUICE: "Come on, babe. Aren't you glad to see me?"

LYDIA: "You disgust me!"

BEETLEJUICE: "Aw come on! You've gotta be a tiny bit glad to see the ol' B Man again?"

LYDIA (angrily): "YOU TRIED TO FORCE ME TO MARRY YOU!!"

BEETLEJUICE: "And I forgive you for leaving me standing at the alter. Hey! I'm not the kind of ghoul that holds a grudge."

Beetlejuice stays true to his promise and offers his service to deal with the Kahuna spirit. He challenges the Kahuna to a surfing competition.

What that might look like.
Beetlejuice wins dispatching both the Kahuna spirit and Lydia's scrupulous partner. Everybody loves them again and Lydia builds the resort in another part of the island. Later on Beetlejuice reappears and he and Lydia make amends. That is until Lydia realizes that Beetlejuice and the Kahuna spirit are now buddies. Beetlejuice and the Kahuna spirit reassure Lydia that everything is cool with the Kahuna spirit now that they are building in a different spot and Lydia's daughter returned the idol (yeah, that happens somewhere too) to its resting spot.

What Beetlejuice and the Kahuna spirit might look like in the film.
To prove it the Kahuna spirit breaks into a very Don Ho sounding rendition of Shake Shake Shake Senora with her daughter doing a mid-air tango much like her mother did in the first film. Lydia is holding out at first, but ultimately joins with her daughter, Beetlejuice and Kahuna.


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